7 Top Tips For Dealing With Toddler Tantrums

Are you at the end of your tether with tantrums in the terrible twos? Or is your threenger testing your patience? Fear not, I have put togetehr my top tips for dealing with toddler tantrums. Watch the video below or read on for ways to cope with this testing phase.

Look for the why

Tantrums in toddlers tend to stem from difficult feelings that they do not know how to communicate. Have there been any changes in your toddler’s life lately? Are they feeling like they want more of your time and don’t know how to ask for it? By looking for reasons that may be causing the tantrums, it is sometimes possible to stop them before they even start.


So many tantrums can be headed off before they escalate into a full blown incident simply by looking for the warning signs that a tantrum is brewing and distracting your toddler. A change of scenery, putting on music or even a big hug at this point can prevent a tantrum altogether.

Reward good behavious

Often tantrums are a cry for attention. Make sure that when your toddler is behaving well, you shower them with over the top praise so that they get used to getting positive attention for positive behaviour.

Don’t make a scene

While I am not suggesting in any way that bad behaviour should be ignored, it shouldn’t be rewarded with excessive attention either. Hard as it may be, keep your cool and keep your reactions to a minimum. Go through the steps of your chosen method, such as time out, but do not create drama.

If a toddler is looking for attention, they are not able to properly differentiate between positive and negative attention. If their undesirable behaviour is getting a reaction, they are likely to keep doing it.

Let your yes be yes

My Nana always used to say “Let your yes be yes and your no be no” and it’s just so true. Think before you speak and avoid making threats that you are unwilling to carry out.

If you say to your child “If you carry on, we are never coming to Nanny’s again” do you think they’ll believe you? No. There is no way that they will be forever banished from their grandparent’s house. They will know you are full of it and not believe a word that you say.

Likewise, if constant nagging changes your no to a yes for an easy life, guess what they are going to do next time they want something……

Use simple language

Think about being in a foreign county. Maybe you remember the odd word from your GCSE language course and can get by, but when the locals start speaking quickly in fast sentences with long words, you are soon lost. This is the case for your toddler. Using language that you would use to speak to an adult when explaining things to your toddler will mean that they will miss most, if not all of what you are saying.

When it comes to behaviour and instructions, keep the language you use with your toddler plain and simple.

Tell them what you want them to do, not what you don’t

Telling children what you don’t want them to do, such as throwing something, allows them to create a visual picture of throwing something. Not only can it potentially put ideas in their head, but it creates a mental image of this action. Often children won’t hear the “don’t” bit, just the remaining instruction. Try saying things like “keep the plate on the table” instead.

Check out the video below for more information about this tip.

Channel your inner Mary Poppins

Close your mouth Micheal, we are not a cod fish

Mary Poppins

When your toddler is testing you, just think “What would Mary Poppins do?” Channel your inner Julie Andrews, sing about a spoonful of sugar and keep smiling. This is a phase, this too shall pass.

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